my father justin (f2fb friend #30) flew in from tallahassee this monday and planned to stay for a week and a day. we had dinner with f2fb friend #306 oj dorson and justin made chicken l’orange in honor of the occasion. the next day, we had lunch with f2fb friend #307 tony adams and then there was the fire. . . .
i went to sleep that night thinking that the visit with justin was going very well. i had a brunch planned for sunday morning in his honor. we were going to the movies to see the artist. then i woke at four o’clock in the morning with a migraine.
i didn’t come downstairs until seven where i found justin had already packed. he said his wife barbara had a dinner that evening and wanted him to return home to join her. he had already called the airlines and rebooked a flight for that afternoon to atlanta and then in the evening a flight from atlanta to tallahassee. it seemed puzzling to me. i felt uneasy. i felt rejected. i felt, and still feel, that i must have done something to offend either justin or his wife and it’s just a matter of me not knowing what it is.
i was proud that i didn’t call domino’s, prouder that i didn’t drink white wine. i still have a migraine. i still wasted time on hulu.com, went to bed at eight o’clock and never got out of my pajamas. . . but this morning, i’m back together except for the bedhead. the temporary rules of my life are back in force: work out every day, take a shower, no going to bed at eight o’clock. otherwise. . . .