i would jump out of a cake but i think it would be alarming. i am, after all, fifty one years old and while i have been adhering to the atkins diet and am nearly back to my fighting weight of 138 there have been some, ahem! changes to the general physique since i was twenty eight. which is mark’s age today!
mark is not even my facebook friend! yet, i wish him a happy birthday! i don’t feel too bad about not sending a birthday present because next week is the fabulous facebook IPO — facebook is valued at nearly 100 billion dollars!
mark could wake up tomorrow morning, spend $300,000 and do it again the next day and the next until he’s eighty and he’d have some left over. talk about being ready for your retirement!
i’m fifty one years old. i’m packing up a lifetime of stuff. in t minus forty three days i will say goodbye to the house i have lived in for so long. i am scared. i was weepy this morning, so much so that i cried when the grocery clerk said “have a nice day”. . . so i wonder:
it’s good to be fifty one. first off, everybody lies about their age so much that whenever i ‘fess to fifty one i get the “no way” eyes. that’s good. second, i don’t have to prove anything–i’ve already raised the kids, there’s no major felony convictions, and if i’m not using a walker, i get bonus points. third, there’s this magazine–aarp–that i’ve suddenly got a free subscription to.
ure, the flesh is a little weaker, squishier, there’s lumps where there should be ba-dumps, and i have to rule out some cherished dreams–earlier this year, i learned that becoming a professional boxer is just not going to happen.
but sometimes i feel like reversing my digits. i love glee. i wear glitter nail polish–and eye shadow. i sometimes wear pink highlights although right now i have feathers. i listen to snow patrol. i text so much that jay, my verizon dude, says i need the children’s plan.
yesterday, i g0t to see my youngest facebook friend–fifteen with a driver’s permit–and all i want to say is “you’re beautiful just exactly as you are and please enjoy the ride!” f2fb friend #221 lizzy donahue lives down the street from me.
adorable, funny, smart--ah, my facebook friend lizzy has it all!
lizzy came over and we talked about this weekend–it’s homecoming! she has great plans and she showed me a picture of her dress on her cell phone. i was a little scandalized but my only piece of advice was don’t slouch.
then she said she wanted to help me with a pressing problem: right after i come back from alaska, i’ll be heading out for an around the world facebook odyssey. i need to brush up on my language skills. lizzy said “just smile, everybody understands a smile!”
me and bear
we then went to see f2fb friend #222 the winnetka youth organization. otherwise known as the YO! it’s in the basement of the community house and it is where i have spent many a friday evening pretending to be too cool to scream with delight when one of my sons played. wyo director elizabeth fales is new to the place–they’ve recently had a complete turnover in staff–but she was game for air hockey. i lost badly and the video lizzy made of me playing air hockey had, ahem, technical difficulties. i think it’s weird that i can be facebook friends with a nonprofit organization. and it’s even weirder that i would lose at air hockey.