my dear friend marky z is a small businessman. he started his little financial empire out of his college dorm room, programming and brainstorming and dealing with the insufferable but undeniably handsome winklevoss twins cameron and tyler.*
yo, marky z, you’ve brought together a lot of people with facebook! and you’ve taken your company public so that we all can invest! uh, well, stock prices have dropped since the ipo at just under forty washingtons to yesterday’s $25 per share. talk about affordability!
marky z is going to be reporting roughly $2.3 billion of income from his stock options alone–you have to add in his wife priscilla’s income as a physician and–who knows?–maybe marky moonlights as a bartender. he does get a deduction for $500,000,000 that he gave to the silicon valley community foundation (and yes, i have the correct number of zeros). the top federal tax rate is 48% and the california state government takes out an extra 13.3%. he hasn’t filed his taxes yet this year, but analysts predict he’s going to owe more than $1,000,000,000 with a top tax rate of 48.3%.
really, should we tell marky z about the 1% arlynn presser surcharge on taxes?
and *tell the winklevoss twins that i’m happy to have dinner with them. just not at the same time. that would be too weird.
imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, the english cleric and writer charles caleb colton opined in his 1822 book “lacon or many things in few words addressed to those who think”… and i think i’m really flattered. in 2011, i endeavored to make good on a new year’s resolution to meet all my facebook friends. there were 325 friends and sometimes, as is the case for so many, i would look at my facebook home page and some status update and i’d think “who is this person, why am i friends with them, and why should i like their link to a lmao video?”
i sallied forth and spent a year getting face time with every friend. i traveled around the world because some of my friends have the misfortune to not live in my dear sweet hometown of winnetka. i learned a lot of new skills–you should definitely invite me over if you have a champagne bottle you want opened with a saber sword or if you want boxing lessons.
ty morin has made a resolution quite similar to mine, hoping to meet nearly 800 of his facebook friends.
he is hoping to complete this project in three or four years. he began his quest with a kickstarter grant campaign to raise travel and production money. he’s even got a title for the documentary he will make about the project–friend request accepted. he’s getting a lot of press and he intends to make this project speak to our interactions with social media. he’s visited with 20 of his friends so far and figures the project will take him three or four years.
yo, marky z, you’ve brought together a lot of people with facebook!
i wish him every luck and want him to know that charles caleb colton is absolutely right: i’m flattered!