Tag Archives: family
sutton lee seymour
i have such admiration for this friend of mine! prescott seymour is a drag queen living in new york who works under the stage name sutton lee seymour. he is part of the seymour family, which is the most admirable family on earth because they share every holiday, sunday dinners, etc. with each other. even the exes. and their kids. and stepkids. and futures.
little shop of horrors is a movie/play/movie about audrey II, a carnivorous plant cared for by a florist assistant seymour who named the audrey II in honor of his true love audrey. audrey is terrorized by the abusive boyfriend orin but finds the courage to leave–because there’s “suddenly seymour” the most popular song from this show is “suddenly seymour” which i can’t get out of my head right now. karma alert: audrey II ends up with a nice orin meal.
meanwhile, my friend works under the name sutton lee seymour sometimes. and he had this to write:
I have to tell this story, and please know it’s not praise I’m looking for. It’s change!
I was at my subway stop last night heading to my show, “in face” but in boy clothes. I do this for physical comfort, not from fear of being gay bashed. But last night I encountered a homeless man who decided to scream at me with hate once he saw my face (btw, I looked really pretty last night). I never really encountered this before.
I wasn’t afraid of him because he was on the Queens bound platform and I was on Manhattan bound platform. But he kept screaming, so I moved. But he wouldn’t stop.
And then something just hit me, I needed to do something. I considered going to the MTA folks in the booth but opted against that. Instead I left the subway station and went to the Dunkin Donuts and bought a cheddar, egg, sausage sandwich, a banana, a donut, and a bottle of water. Btw, nobody seemed bothered by my stunning face.
I went back up to the platforms, going to the Queens bound side this time. And I found the homeless man. And yes he did start yelling at me again. And I shut him up saying…
“This food is for you. Please eat up and remember it was a ‘faggot’ who decided to love you instead of ignore you today.”
And he didn’t do anything for a minute so I just left the food in front of him. And then he said thank you, which honestly surprised me because I was expecting more hate. And I left for my platform with no slurs coming from the man. And my train pulled up as I got back over and I saw him eating. And I headed to my show.
I realize that maybe this was risky, but there’s still so much hate out there that we can’t ignore it or fear it. And we can’t change hate with more hate. Only love. Will this change that man forever? Probably not. But I’m certain he won’t forget. At the end of the day, there are people who still need help. And hopefully, that man will think twice before he starts gay bashing. That’s my wish.
prescott, you are my hero!
the comedian’s club
robin williams is upstairs at the comedian’s club, hanging with chris farley, john belushi, tony hancock, doodles weaver and freddie prinze. . .
NOT the freddie prinze having a bitchfest with keifer sutherland. nope, i’m talking about his father, the star of the popular seventies show “chico and the man” which was canceled when freddie prinze shot himself to death. in front of his manager dusty snyder. who must have been in therapy for years.
robin had family–children and a loving wife susan. he had success–well, except for the very unfortunate movie patch adams. and he left four movies in varying degrees of completion. including a sequel to mrs. doubtfire and another in the night at the museum franchise. he was a spokesman for st. judge’s children’s hospital. family, creative success, purpose–he had it all. and then on sunday evening, he tried to kill himself by slitting his wrists. unsuccessful at doing anything more than inflicting superficial wounds, he used a belt and a closet door and hung himself.
i have struggled, particularly this past year. with thoughts that i have no purpose, that i have lost some vital connections with my family, that the world would be quite a bit better without me.
in other news, this particular snake was counting on me. i fed him mice, gave him water, but he died. wow, disposing of his body was quite an enterprise. the apartment smells to high heaven because the blowflies deposited larvae before i got the courage to pick up mr. snake and put him in a garbage bag.
i know what it’s like to wake up and think “i’m still here. it’s not time to die. God, can’t this end?” but i have always known that i wouldn’t do anything to harm myself because i don’t want to harm my sons, my stepson, my stepdaughter, and my exhusband that way. and sometimes, just that is enough to keep me going.
so i gotta ask. . .
we miss you, and i’m sorry that there wasn’t anything that could make you stay. . . what is it about the funniest people hiding the greatest sadness? maybe comedy is a compensation for sadness.
i hope you’re having a wonderful time hanging out at the comedian’s club.
they never call, they never write. . .
. . . and they don’t text, email, post on my facebook page, invite me to their linkedIn network, tweet at me, instagramatic me, or send a carrier pigeon. despite all the advances in communications, twentysomething sons just don’t communicate with their moms. at least, this is what i’ve been advised.
i have a preflight ritual: as soon as i bolt away from the t.s.a. stormtroopers (uh, agents) i head for the bar, order a beer and text both my sons that the plane is about to take off and i love them. one of them almost always texts back “love you too” the other, meh, not so much.
some people say that if you’ve done your job well, then you WON’T hear from them. that they’re independent. i’m not so sure.
in any event, i was in st. louis to visit with facebook friend #327 daniel reyna. he invited me to his home on a sunday afternoon for a dinner he would be making. ordinarily, i wouldn’t meet a facebook friend for the first time in their home. but for daniel there were two important exceptional circumstances: he was inviting me to a family dinner and he has a limited comfort zone in which he operates without anxiety attacks. also, i had a chaperone.
the reyna family is second generation mexican: mrs. reyna, daniel’s mom, has nine siblings and her husband has a large family as well. the reynas have five children including daniel and his twin brother david. every sunday the reynas get together for an afternoon dinner. while cousins are welcome, the five siblings and their significant others and children are the core of the meal. the siblings take turns hosting and each host is allowed to invite an extra guest. i was honored to be daniel’s guest. and i was intrigued as to what he would make for us. i was ushered into a kitchen and met the family. the reynas are a boisterous group, five different conversations going on at once, and so many times was i asked if i wanted something to drink and ended up with three beers, a glass of wine and a soda in front of me.
i had been eating st. louis’ favorite specialty–fried ravioli–for two days. this dish is not exactly atkins diet material but this and a double i.p.a. is what i’ll be asking for when i’m on death row and the warden asks “what’s that last meal going to be?”
a small light meal of an antipasto platter, followed up by pulled pork, roast chicken, barbecue ribs, mashed potatoes, spanish rice, cole slaw, bread, baked beans, and daniel’s twin david had made chocolate pie and apple pie. whoops, i forgot the louisiana bundt cake and ice cream sandwiches.
in addition to the reynas getting together for sunday meals, they also host a family olympics in the summer with egg tosses, races, and a pie eating contest. they have a christmas talent show for each other. they go to mexico every year–although daniel doesn’t go with because of his anxiety. and they invent their own games, one of which–spoons–they tried to teach me.
i told mrs. reyna that she was so lucky to have her children with her and she said “the best present a mom can give her children is a family.” she is absolutely right.
daniel was a bit shy about having his picture put in a blog post. i never post pictures that people don’t want me to. so i keep the picture in my cellphone. it was late when i had to say goodbye and i didn’t really say goodbye. i said au revoir, until we see each other again. even if it’s on facebook.
later that day, i was on facebook and noticed a status update of one of my sons on my newsfeed. with all the tools of communication, i think it just makes us MORE aware of wanting what the reynas have every sunday afternoon.
God is startled to hear from my dad
this year has been about facebook, yes, but it’s also been about family, friendship, and God. i am reminded of jonathan edwards’ sermon “sinners in the hands of an angry God” every day. i think that’s the theological firestorm i’ve walked around with. but i’ve come to see every facebook friend as having a unique relationship to God. and it makes me realize how narrow my focus has been. there is a great joy and happiness that comes with having a faith in a loving and righteous God.
my father justin (f2fb #30) is an atheist. he’s like christopher hitchens. he’s facing cancer and never once has decided on converting.
yesterday i worked out because i had an intense pain just under my sternum. i figured if i was really having a heart attack i would collapse on the stairmaster and somebody would call for an ambulance. i made sure to wear fresh underwear. when i didn’t collapse i went to the doctor who gave me drugs for my stomach. he also, quite spontaneously and without any credible evidence, declared that i was anxious and might need meds for that. quel surprise!!!
i have not felt any better. during the day, many facebook friends suggested that they were praying for me. but i also received a message from my dad–
‘gainst my religious lacks, but am praying as well. you’ve already done enough on the resolution to qualify for the whole year already. bless you and keep you.
well that was a surprise. a very nice surprise.
here is a picture of justin, this would have been the first time we met when i was twenty five. from left to right–me, fritz leiber, justin, barbara and the little one is casey (f2fb #31) who is an actress in new york.
thanks, dad.
up next, a visit with the ultimate cougar!
mr. f2fb #100 tells me how to protect my assets!
today’s economic news is pretty disheartening. all this year, i have been talking to people who have lost their jobs, who are having their hours cut back, who are worried that they’re drowning in debt. bill seymour is seventy five years old and he’s weathered a few economic reversals. he got an mba from harvard a few months before i was born, so he’s had some time to assess the market and he has some interesting advice–
first and foremost, if you’re going to buy a piece of real estate, do your best to pay it off in its entirety.
and second, consider this–
we went to grandpa’s for lunch. the first time i met bill there, i was told by his son charlie (f2fb #20) that we were going to grandpa’s. i arrived with a bromeliad. i knew that bill’s grandfather was the famous harry horder who owned a stationer’s shop in chicago. i was quite abashed when i discovered that grandpa’s was not a person but, rather, a restaurant on prairie street in glenview. it is not a point of etiquette to bring a hostess gift in the circumstances.
bill seymour is married to paddy seymour and has two ex-wives, one of whom is deceased. he has four children an outsider might regard as “his own”, two stepchildren from the second wife, two stepchildren who came with paddy, as well as a daughter of paddy’s first husband (or maybe second, i’m quite confused by this stuff). bill takes the position that all these children: deb, tom, charlie, prescott, cory, christie, jay, chris, and robin are all to be regarded as his children. he is friends with his first ex-wife and with the first husband of his second wife. he is somebody who doesn’t really need facebook because he creates he is friends and family to everyone!
arlynnpresser 