Tag Archives: friendship

April 14, 2012

facebook, google, can they coexist?

By arlynnpresser

i’m so sorry, mark, there is a possibility that facebook will fail.  that would be awful for me, because then i would have no social life since i made a new years resolution to meet all my facebook friends in 2011. i succeeded at my resolution–way better than those resolutions to lose five pounds and give up white wine–but i also gained new friends.  i really like facebook.

mark made this possible. however, i am not stalking him. so no temporary restraining orders please! however, i think he has to watch out for google. specifically google chrome. . . it's pretty, it's catchy, and it isn't mark's friend.

 

google chrome didn’t exist three years ago.  now, it’s threatening to topple internet explorer as the dominant browser.  why should facebook worry?  or rather, why should mark worry?  well, the problem is that google doesn’t want to be a mere browser tool.

i'd like to be a browser tool but maybe i'm too old. after all, fifty one is rather ancient.

 

google has ambitious plans with google plus, the company’s “spine”, and uh oh, maybe it can topple the facebook empire.  mostly because google has so many interesting products–google, gmail, android, google search and my favorite google translator which is how i communicate with my peeps.  since i can barely speak a word of english much less any other language.  and if google browser is the gateway drug of our internet we’re going to have to take a few extra steps to get to facebook.  google chrome is now 30.9% of the browser market and they want you to use google plus.  omg, mr. dreamy, remember that dude?

wait, does this mean that fortunes can be won, lost, and won again in this business?

 

in any event, my use of facebook is quite simple.  i connect, reconnect, re-reconnect with friends and family and i have made it my mission to meet these friends in person.  like, actually where we are both there.  without a computer.  without a laptop.  even an ipad.  it’s really weird.  and it’s changed me.

 

 

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April 8, 2012

a facebook matchmaker experience-a return to detroit

By arlynnpresser

i enjoyed my time with f2fb friend #312 marguerite joseph and for those of you who have facebook, i hope you’ll look her up and send her a birthday greeting!  she is one hundred and four years old but doesn’t look a day over seventy five.  oddly, facebook doesn’t recognize its users as ever being older than 99 so i guess she can take that to the department of motor vehicles and get a new license.

it was back to detroit that i was heading, with matchmaking on my mind.  i revisited f2fb friend 301 brenda jeffries because i believed i had some unfinished business.

across from brenda's home is a vacant lot, not an unusual circumstance in her neighborhood. she has created a shrine to her daughter raven, who was abducted while playing there when she was six years old. three days later, the amber alert went into effect and raven's body was found. i brought three baby duck statuaries and a mommy duck to the shrine to represent brenda's family. the city of detroit owns the lot and is willing to sell it to brenda for four hundred dollars.

in some neighborhoods of detroit, there are so many abandoned lots that city services like garbage pick up, fire protection and police patrols are inefficient.  if there’s only one house occupied on each of ten blocks in a neighborhood, it really stretches resources.

the city is implementing a program where there are "zones" where city services will continue to be offered and residents of detroit are encouraged to move into those zones or to face life with only their own resources. some corporations are purchasing land outside of the zones with an eye towards developing farms, industrial parks, etc. but what about brenda, who definitely doesn't want to move? what to do with the land that includes what is for her the sacred place of her daughter's spirit? well, it got me thinking. . . about the christmas box angel memorial i visited with f2fb friend #310 julia kovach. . .

both of these friends, julia and brenda, are members of a club nobody ever wants to join–the club of those who have lost a child.  in southgate michigan is the christmas box angel surrounded by the healing bricks that memorialize the lost children.  but don’t you think brenda’s neighborhood could possibly carry that grief and turn it into a positive?  maybe the synergy of julia and brenda together could do that!

julia is also a writer and when i told her the story of raven’s abduction and murder, i realized that she could approach the story with uncommon sympathy and so i have put the two women together.  a story, a memorial park, something good is going to come of their friendship!  on this easter, i think of renewal and i think of the shrine on brenda’s block as the first part of that renewal.

however, i hope she doesn’t throw out the ducks when she’s renovating.  i have become fond of the shrine because it represents the greatest of loves.

brenda's granddaughter paris is adorable and i love holding her and spending time with her! she is a great comfort to brenda!

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April 5, 2012

nobody (except my f2fb friend #312) lies about their age on facebook!

By arlynnpresser

i left southgate michigan striking north towards detroit, thinking about how i was going to persuade f2fb friend #311 julia kovach to help out another facebook friend. . . last year my new year’s resolution was to meet every one of my 325 facebook friends.  to get out from behind the computer. . .  to spend real time with real friends.  now i think something intriguing is developing in terms of putting together facebook friends who need each other.

but first, my oldest facebook friend–she’s marguerite joseph (f2fb friend #312) and she’s 104 years old.  facebook has lots of rules.  for instance, i can’t have more than 5000 friends.  not just me, nobody can have more than 5000 friends.

i was put up for adoption when i was three years old. i tracked down my biological parents when i was twenty five using a private detective--this is b.f. before facebook which has definitely made it easier to locate missing relatives. a few years after we met, my mother aleta decided she didn't want anything to do with me. i tracked her down on facebook and sent a friendship request two months ago. as it stands now, even if she hit "confirm" we might not be able to be friends because i have 5000 friends. i guess there's a good reason for the policy but i sure hope if my mom decides to be my friend that mark zuckerberg will allow that!

 

my friend marguerite joseph is 104 years old.  she is turning 105 on april 19th. however, facebook only recognizes a maximum age of 99.  doesn’t facebook realize that centenarians use facebook too?

here i am with marguerite and her granddaughter gail marlow (f2fb friend #109). the last time i saw gail was last year as part of this project. she owned a nightclub in cincinnati. that evening, i met a wonderful young male dancer who explained he was only doing it to put himself through medical school. i also got a jello shot licked off my chest. really, maybe i should shut up!

 

marguerite definitely looks younger than 104 and she was a most wonderful hostess for the evening.  i stayed overnight and prepared for the next day’s meeting in detroit with not one, not two, but three different facebook friends.  each of whom needs another of my facebook friends. . . . well, at least i think they do!

p.s. log on your facebook account, find marguerite joseph, send her a birthday greeting (tell her you’re my friend)–i promise that her granddaughter will read each greeting to her and when you’re having your one hundred and fifth birthday, i’ll send you a birthday greeting on facebook!  even if facebook says you’re a mere 99 years old!

i wonder. . . do you think facebook could shave 6 years off my official age?

NAH!

nobody lies about their age on facebook!

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April 3, 2012

all you need is one book — a party invitation for YOU!

By arlynnpresser

i have been so blessed with this project of meeting my facebook friends–and i have been working with facebook friend #306 oj dorson in creating an ebook about the experience!  this weekend i headed for michigan and landed in coldwater.  my facebook friends molly and jeff parshall live in coldwater and i’ve visited with both of them before.  molly has agoraphobia and finds it difficult to leave the house.  she’s made a lot of progress working on herself in the past few months.  she even sent me a picture of herself at the nearby playground with her son blake!

but every personal transformation has some setbacks.  jeez, i’m a six setbacks a day and eight victories person myself.  sunday, we were thinking of going to the park as a quartet–blake, molly, jeff and me–but it didn’t work out.  molly had to return home, to her “safe” place.

having any sort of disability, illness, quirk puts pressure on everybody else in the family.  jeff is a strong, taciturn, family protective man who puts his energies into his work as a machinist and he went back to working around the house.  molly sent me and blake off to the park.  blake is a boy with a strong, generous heart and he asked if he could make a video for my blog.

we went home and he picked out eight more books!  i know that i won’t see the parshalls at the party in winnetka but i know that they are part of the creation of this special day!  and molly has no greater cheerleader than her son blake–he understands sometimes his mom can’t do things she wants to do, that he wants to do.  he loves trains and has an ambition to take a train ride.  i can’t wait for the day when i walk down to the winnetka train station and pick up the parshall family!

i am facebook friends with the parshalls.  it’s important sometimes to come out from behind our technology and spend a day together. . . .

by the way, the invitation to the party–it benefits reach out and read illinois and the guest list is quite exclusive. . . it includes YOU!!!!

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April 1, 2012

who doesn’t get motivated by a new dress?

By arlynnpresser

colleen is a facebook friend who sometimes has trouble with driving by herself. she set up a system after my visit this winter so that every time she faced that fear she put ten dollars towards a dress she and i had admired in taylorville's best dress shop. this is her birthday picture and she's wearing the dress. .. can i get an amen that she looks gorgeous??? and like she said, "who doesn't get motivated by a new dress?"

 

we can face adversity, fear, and adverse circumstances by treating it like a game with ourselves and that’s what my facebook friend (number 298 if we’re counting) did with her fear.  she’s now the proud owner of a gorgeous white dress that makes her look HAWT!!!! oh, and also, some pride.

congratulations colleen!!!

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March 29, 2012

are you crazy? you’re going to get yourself killed out there!

By arlynnpresser

just a few hours before the beginning of the year 2011, i took a look at my facebook friends list and said “gee, who ARE all these people?  and when was the last time i saw any of them?”  i made a resolution to meet and spend time with each and every friend–all 325 of them–before the end of the year.  it was quite a year.

but something i heard over and over from people was “are you crazy?  you’re going to get yourself killed!”

catherine barnes, 32, of ohio traveled by herself to wales to meet some facebook friends for the first time. she disappeared in january and her frantic family spent many a night believing she might met an awful fate. the swansea police located her in february. what a relief!

whenever i met a facebook friend, if it was for the first time, i always made sure i had a chaperone or that i was in a public place.  i NEVER met someone in my home or in their home.  only one time was there an exception. . . .

one facebook friend, who was mutual friends with a girlfriend of mine, kept insisting that we should meet at my house and that he would be such a gentleman as to bring a bottle of wine. for a full year we went back and forth on this issue, and i would always decline. or we would make arrangements to meet in a public place and he would cancel at the last minute. finally, one day i relented and said "sure, come on over" he was on his way! and when he called to say he was ten minutes away, i reminded him that i had houseguests--pictured here--zeeb and beth feywood. the facebook friend never showed up. he's part of the ten percent i never got to meet!

 

so i wasn’t completely surprised by the news that the brooklyn orthodox jewish girls school beth rivkah asks its students to not use facebook.  students who are discovered to have facebook accounts are ordered to delete them and pay a one hundred dollar fine. a firestorm of publicity has ensued in the past few weeks because several girls have been kicked out of the school for not adhering to the rule.

“girls are getting killed on the internet,”  school administrator benzion stock told the new york post.  “that’s the reason for it.”

he also added that facebook “is not a modest thing to do”, claiming the internet ruins marriages and families.  i agree.  girls are getting killed by people that they meet on the internet in unsafe situations.  some marriages and families are destroyed by affairs that are begun as simple facebook friendships.  but by that logic, we need to immediately get rid of other forms of communication, starting with . . .

the post office? telegraph? carrier pigeons? semaphores? what are we thinking about??? any of these things could be dangerous for marriages, families, our very lives because they foster communication!

 

maybe instead, people need to set up safeguards for themselves.  which brings me to f2fb friend #309, the not at all dangerous martin ruffner.  ruffner is a gentleman and, as such, it wouldn’t even dawn on him to ask me to meet him outside of a public place.  in this case, libertyville’s jamaican hawaiian irish english restaurant firkin’s, for lunch.  we arrived separately.  we enjoyed a meal together and we talked about our children.

i have two sons and so does martin. he has been following my blog and my story in part because he identifies. . . he has been through a rough patch but he has found comfort and strength in his family and friends--some of whom are on facebook!

during last year, i was grateful to the many chaperones who made the trips possible!  now i am on my way out the door to visit with facebook friends for whom i feel honored to pay it forward!

 

 

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March 29, 2012

a face to facebook invitation!

By arlynnpresser

it’s been a really wonderful year and a few months of meeting facebook friends around the neighborhood and around the world.  while it’s helped me a lot with anxiety attacks and agoraphobia, it’s most important aspect is to bring facebook’s promise of friendship a reality!  it’s so important that friendship not JUST be a facebook thing, an internet friendship, an email correspondence. 

soooooooooooooo. . . . 

an invitation to all my blogging friends, my facebook friends, my friends friends. . .

date/time:  april 28, five to seven p.m.

where:  round table books at round table books at 572 lincoln avenue in winnetka, illinois

why:  because i really, really want to meet you and arthur frank, proprietor, wants to celebrate the creation of a book celebrating my year and a quarter of facebook friendship.  it’s like a book launch before a book.  and a celebration of friendship!

what to bring:  your sweet self and a new or gently used book to donate to reach out and read illinois which provides children’s books to low income pediatric clinics.

 

will you please come to the party?

 

 

Image

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March 26, 2012

i get a facebook friendship challenge. . . with a phone call to follow!

By arlynnpresser

a facebook friend sent the following message to me and a few others.  i was terrifically flattered and also very humbled.  i have never met this facebook friend but i am looking forward to getting a phone call in the next couple of weeks!

 

Dear Friends,

Hi everyone, (Warning: personal sharing to follow. Proceed at your own risk.)  🙂 As you may or may not know I freelance/consult from my home office. Thankfully, this year has been very busy. That includes everyday including most weekends. This past month I put in 30-40 hour weeks working at McDonald’s corporate headquarters while handing my own clients on nights and weekends. The McDonald’s gig is now complete and I see open space in my calendar. Why this info? I feel stuck. I’ve concentrated so much on work that I’ve left my friendships by the wayside. I haven’t actively been pursuing any lunches or coffees etc. Also, After 3 months  of walking 3 times a day, I’ve now gone 3 weeks without any form of exercise. Just sitting  here and doing nothing isn’t working 🙂  So it’s time to act. I’ve been inspired by a Facebook friend whom I have never met but heard about on the radio and have since been following her Facebook accounts and blogs. She suffers from agoraphobia and decided to visit all her Facebook friends around the world in person. Her name is Arlynn Leiber Presser if your interested in reading about her. She has inspired me to action because she stepped right through her fears and phobias and did it and continues to do it. Reading her blog I think I’m at home now more then she is. 🙂 So why am I writing this? To face a fear of mine? Picking up the phone and calling someone to plan something hasn’t been my style. I’ve always waited for others to get the ball rollling. Waited to the last minute. Going to the cave is great but it gets old after awhile. Well you know what? I’m getting to old for this shit! I’m not putting this out there to fish for calls. I’m am putting it out to the universe and to my friends and just to let you know I will be calling!  🙂 Peace and love, Mr. T

 

mr. t, you have my phone number!

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March 25, 2012

damn! mark zuckerberg finally emails me and i’ve won a prize!!!!

By arlynnpresser 
 
wow, wow, wow!!!!  just read it!  i've won something!

i've been totally in love with this ring designed by alexis bittar's haversham collection. it's only two hundred smackers and i think i could afford it if this email is valid.

 

1601 S. California Ave,
Palo Alto,
CA 94304.

Ref: 990078567
Batch: 9056490602/333
Winning no: FB8701/LPRC
ticket number: 987061725 07056490902
serial number: 7541137207


CONGRATULATIONS.

This is to inform the bearer that You have won the sum of $1,000000 OUR 2012 SWEEPSTAKES (Facebook Inc) This is a bonus to promote our users worldwide through this online lottery, Which is fully based on an electronic selection.

We hereby approve you a lump sum of $1,000000 (One Million Dollars) in Cash Credit File- ILP/HW 47509/02 from the total cash prize for eight lucky winners in this category.

All participant were selected through a computer balloting system drawn in Nine hundred thousand E-mail address on Facebook website from the listed countries: Canada,Australia,United States, Asia, Europe, Middle East and Oceania as
part of our international promotions program which is conducted annually.

This Lotto was promoted and sponsored by a conglomerate of some multinational companies as part of their social responsibility to the citizens in the Aspect that impacts peoples lifestyle worldwide.

Further more your details(e-mail address) falls within our European representative office in Amsterdam, Holland, as indicated in your play coupon and your prize of US$1,000000 will be released to you from this regional branch office in England.
We hope with part of your prize, you will participate in our end of year high stakes for US$1.3 Billion international draw.

HOW TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE:

Simply contact your Fiduciary Agent
Name - Desmond Arthur
E-mail address - claimsagent707@gmail.com


Please quote your reference,batch and winning number as well as your full name, address and telephone number to help locate your file easily.

For security reasons, we advice all winners to keep this information confidential from the public until your claim is processed and your prize released to you. Keep it secret. Keep it safe.
This is part of our security protocol to avoid double claiming and unwarranted taking advantage of this program by non-participant or unofficial personnel.

Note, all winnings MUST be claimed before the end of this program; otherwise all funds will be returned as Unclaimed and eventually donated to charity organizations.
PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO THIS EMAIL.CONTACT YOUR CLAIMS AGENT (Desmond Arthur) HERE - claimsagent707@gmail.com
ANY BREACH OF CONFIDENTIALITY ON THE PART OF THE WINNERS WILL RESULT TO DISQUALIFICATION.


Once again Congratulations on your winnings.
Yours faithfully,
Mark Zuckerberg
Online coordinator for Facebook
Online lottery
www.facebook.com

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Introducing the New Facebook Home Page Based on your feedback, we've made some improvements:

* Streamlined updates
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*E.T.C
We hope you enjoy these new features and that you will continue to help us provide innovations that make your experience the best it can be.

The Facebook Team
---------------------------------------------------
©2004-2012 www.facebook.com All Rights Reserved.

sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. . . .

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March 24, 2012

facebook gives me several unexpected children and a new job. . . plus why you should be friends with james michener

By arlynnpresser

i counted up my children on my profile page.  it’s always good to keep track of family.  it turns out that yes, i have the two sons–joseph presser and eastman presser–that i recall from before i even had facebook.

there was, of course, justin my father, who cut short his visit to winnetka the day before yesterday. my pajama day may have been because i felt rejected but it could also have been a migraine. either way, i resisted the urge to pop open the vino although i couldn't resist hulu.com episodes of peep show and house!

i have acquired five daughters.  they’re all adorable.  they’re right there on my profile page.  i also have three new sons.  this was no miracle of medicine.

it WOULD be a medical miracle if i had another child. after all, i'm fifty one and i don't have a husband. on the other hand, if there's anything the last year has taught me, it's that you can do anything you set your mind to!

i also have a sister.  well, two.  casey leiber was someone i have known since i was twenty five and she was a wee baby.  i’m also sisters with kim price (i wonder if this means she’ll let me borrow a pretty dress for next saturday night?)  in any event, that’s the magic of facebook is the playing around with relationships.

gay marriage is a contentious issue in america. maybe we should bear in mind that on facebook, you can get married to anybody you want to. i understand it's the fashion amongst my teenaged facebook girlfriends to announce that they are married to a sibling or to their very best girlfriend. in this way, they communicate not that they're really married but that they are available to date.

the other surprise i discovered as i looked at my profile page was that i have a job!  it’s so cool!  we have over eight percent unemployment the last that i checked and it’s a pretty great feeling to know i have a job!  it’s at round table books in winnetka.  they have a facebook page and they added me as an employee.

round table books at 572-b lincoln avenue in winnetka is listed as my employer. i think this happened because one of their people was playing around with facebook and thought it might be fun to include me! i'm flattered. where's my check and when do i have to come to work?

if i’m not going to work at a book store, i might try making money another way.  by writing a book.  but first i have to make friends with james michener.  at least this is what my facebook friend #308 james crumley tells me. . .

james has writtten seven novels, including the above mentioned “God bless this kitchen” — he’s owned two publishing businesses and was a single father to his son.   he’s working on a new piece and i can’t wait to read it!

sadly, the american author of over forty novels died in 1997. but he still has a facebook page!!!!!

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